I was talking to someone on a forum a while ago who was thinking about getting married. One of the questions she asked me should she feel bad about not being excited to spend the rest of her life with someone?
I said no and it’s an answer I still stand by.
Being in a relationship is hard work and 70% of the time not very exciting – it’s mostly about compromise and pottering along in life together. I know not all relationships work like that but those that have to rely on excitement to maintain that relationship are the ones more likely to be in trouble.
When people speak about getting stuck in a rut that is a very different thing – that happens when a relationship goes stale or you start to take each other for granted. Day to day marriage however is mainly made up of talking about work, shopping lists and the kids.
It might sound depressing but its not. We may not be planning to trek every mountain in the world or skydive in 30 different locations but we are planning our future and when you think about it properly that’s even more exciting. We aren’t planning to go travelling to exciting new places but we are planning to spend at least another 40 or 50 years together which is really a much bigger deal!
All in all marriage is a big step to take and one you have to be 100% certain about. If you even have one tiny doubt then pay attention to it and think about it before diving in head first.
Marriage may not be the most exciting thing in the world but it is a lifelong commitment and if you are prepared to make that commitment is a much more important question than if it is ok not to be excited by it.